Whether you graduate college with Latin honors or you simply choose to head onto the depths of a long winding road called adulthood, building a career and earning a living aren’t how the movies portray them to be.

The early twenties is one of the most pivotal time in our lives. All the hard work you will render in this period will determine what you will be, what you will do, and what you will have when you are handling household bills of your own. And when we should be focused on laying the bricks of our careers down for the future we’ve always dreamed of, where does being in a relationship fit?

As a young millennial who is fresh out of college, a common discussion between me and my peers are the woes of starting out in a competitive and cut-throat industry. There is excitement in building a career despite the frustrations and struggles. It is similar to finally being allowed to participate in the adults’ discussion during family dinners. But a simple truth remains for my friends and I; we are all struggling to make a name for ourselves or to simply earn a living that our actual, tangible relationships suffer. Looking at the bigger picture, however, after the novelty of the first job has fizzled, we always go back to craving for human interaction.

To answer the ultimate question on what a young person of this age should prioritize between a career and a romantic relationship, I asked a number of people on their views regarding the two.

What are you pursuing right now between building a career and being in a relationship?

People have different priorities in life. Some are focused on building a career: They have responsibilities to their family and to themselves. These responsibilities and goals need them to focus on their jobs or in furthering their education.

“Money is important for me. You can’t love without money; you need money for the expenses if ever you choose to engage yourself in a relationship.”

Young adults might have the tendency to focus on their career because it is their first step into being on their own. First jobs are stressful as it is exciting, and earning the first paycheck is more rewarding than a silly crush. A lot of the individuals I asked who chose career also quipped that love, or more specifically, a romantic relationship, isn’t a necessity for them. Not right now, anyway.

Some, however, believe that focusing on the person you want to be with in the future is more valuable in the long run. They are working hard because it is a prerequisite for the good life they want to provide for their partners. Also taking into consideration that women have a body clock, the pressure to find a partner is higher amongst women who want to start a family eventually.

There are also a lot of factors—financial stability and emotional capacity—to consider before one chooses to settle down. It is, after all, the rest of your life we are talking about.

“Settling down requires a lot of maturity.”

In the end, you don’t have to choose between your career and being in a relationship. You can choose both instead and learn to balance it. Always check your priorities as it will vary throughout the years.

References:

The Key to Success? Relationships. https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/230783

Positive Relationships Are The Key To Business Success. http://www.businessknowhow.com/growth/positiverelationships.htm

The 10 Reasons Why You Should Invest In Your Career Rather Than A Relationship. http://elitedaily.com/money/entrepreneurship/the-10-reasons-why-you-should-invest-in-your-career-rather-than-a-relationship/

The female fertility clock ‘starts ticking at 27’. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-112136/The-female-fertility-clock-starts-ticking-27.html

Georgette Dela Rama

Georgette is an art graduate whose recent idée fixe is the late 19th-century Philippine history. She likes beaches, pop culture, history, and books. She can spend entire weekends in a cocoon made out of a blanket to read or watch films.